the slime of all my yesterdays

good places to have talks: laundromats, bathtubs, cars with the engine turned off, in line for roller coasters, stairways, patches of grass in front of apartment buildings. this blog may talk about these places!

Name:
Location: New York, New York, United States

grew up in birmingham, alabama. went to college in los angeles and have now been in new york for six years. i work in development for a non-profit that supports a group of all-girls public schools, and i find it very difficult to balance that professional side of me with the creative, story telling side. i miss writing stories every day, as i had to in college for my creative writing degree. i miss sitting down and knowing that within an hour something i was proud of, something sacred and never before shared, would be living, outside of me. i want, very deeply, to reach a place that allows me space for both sides.

Friday, October 01, 2004

one of these will be worth something

this is what i do when i have writers block:

ryan's mom used to let him have one solid minute of screaming profanities in the car per day.
a volcano erupted. a baby was born people kissed a dog was hit and someones book got published.
i couldnt sleep last night because of the word "bilateral." and "split screen."
and because of ann richard's jowls.
and because of technical difficulties.

his body is smooth and soft.
andy saw two bulls fighting each other in china when he was a little boy.
when beth hit that womans car senior year, we went to the gas station, bought a couple beers and took them to caldwell park. we swung on the swings and i told her it wasnt her fault.
sometimes it feels like theres a vacuum in my ears and i only think i can hear anything.
sometimes lauren has difficulty breathing.

every girl i saw last night at la barca had on a solid color skintight top and a black skirt or seven jeans. and i saw these 2 girls from WYSE and i could barely recognize them they were so eyelined and foundationed.
the other day at subway this man came in and was trying to find a plug for a motorized wheelchair with tubes coming out of it. it seemed like he was on speed, he had a super jumbo plastic big gulp cup and started emptying real packs of sugar into it. i went to the trashcan and he asked me for money becuase he has 2 young daughters. i gave him the only cash i had- 2 bucks. he never looked at me but said, under his breath as he was tearing open three sugar packets at once, "you have a good heart."

ryan comes back tonight.
nick is in philly, about to hear bruce springsteen.
i worked in a pirate store.
grilled cheese sammiches and tomato soup.
caldwell and i, lost in colorado with all of our ski gear, and i slip on the ice and cry through tears. he slides down there with me and we figure out what to do.
a few weeks ago i took a bath, sang along to the indigo girls, and remembered myself.

its not a story, but it feels like one. and though im not sure what, somethings unblocked.

1 Comments:

Blogger kb said...

singing along to indigo girls always makes me remember myself too, especially language or the kiss. i made a wild stab at picture blogging and in the process deleted one of your comments. don't think i didn't care. thanks.

8:52 AM  

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