swimming with the creature

they sat side by side on the couch, closer than they had to be. there were other people watching the movie but it didnt feel that way to meredith. she was rarely alone with him anymore, so sometimes when they were in public or with their friends she would just blur them out, like you can do when you stare at one thing for a long time and everything around it dissolves. they were watching the creature from the black lagoon; she had never seen it before and that realization stunned her, that something so beautiful and perfect had been kept from her all of her life. it made her overwhelmed and just plain sad- what else was there floating around that could take her breath away? where were those things, and why had she not found them yet?

it wasnt the whole film that she loved, actually. it was just one scene, where the beautiful woman is in the ocean, floating on her back. the creature, who looks like a man in an oversized gorilla suit, swims underneath the woman, getting closer and closer. there is seaweed squirming from the bottom of the screen and sunlight seeping through the top. the woman is wearing a one piece bathing suit and she begins to do the backstroke. you can tell she is smiling, and feels warm and strong. this was meredith's favorite stroke in elementary school when she was good at swimming. it wasnt scary at all, you have complete control and cant help but feel graceful. her mother used to call her esther williams when she did it, and she imagined esther as the perfect ideal of a movie star. soft and smooth and long and unblemished.

the creature follows her underwater. he doesnt want to hurt her, he doesnt want to do anything really, except be close to her. he begins to float on his back, right underneath her, moving at the same speed. there is no questioning why he doesnt float to the top- he just doenst because if he did, she would know that he was there and she would become scared. but she shouldnt be scared, thats the whole point.

light pushes threads around them, framing them. he gets closer and closer and then its hard to even tell the difference between the two of them. it brought tears to meredith's eyes, hot burning ones that have been waiting for that image all of her life.

"does the creature love her?" she whispered to him, though everyone could probably hear.

his arms were folded across his chest but he leaned into her a little bit.

"he has...a genuine affection for her."

the scene continued, them swimming along, the light all around them.

"but, does he love her?"

"i'm not sure. it's hard to tell. there's no way of knowing what goes on inside of that creature."

the creature knows it can't last forever and sinks back into the seaweed.